For the past couple of weeks, I've been trying to get something resembling a reason as to why bad things happen to good people. So far, I've mentioned that (1) God has a perspective that we don't have, so when He allows bad things to happen, we need to trust that He does so for our benefit, and (2) The reason bad things like death and disease happen at all is the sin of our hearts, so technically, the blame for tragedy in this world falls on us.
The last thing I want to mention is something I learned from watching Shadowlands, a movie about the love story of C.S. Lewis and his wife Joy. At the end of the movie, after Joy has died of cancer, Lewis says something that I think rings very true. "The pain now is part of the happiness then."
Basically, he's saying that the reason he felt pain when Joy died was because she made him happy, and to be free of the pain of losing her would mean to never experience the happiness that she gave him. We could say the same about the world in general. The reason that we experience pain when tragedies and disasters strike is because we can point to a time where things were good. Lewis felt pain at Joy's death because he experienced happiness in her life. A divorced husband feels pain because he experienced happiness in marriage. Parents of a sick child feel pain because they know the happiness of seeing the child happy and healthy.
There's an old saying that goes like this: "Better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all." We can debate on whether or not that statement is true; for some people avoiding the pain of loss is worth sacrificing the happiness that comes before. But either way, the point I want to make is that if God were truly mean, if He were "a mean kid with a magnifying glass," He would never have let us feel the happiness before. Lewis would never have met Joy, the divorced husband would never have been married, and the parents would never have had children to begin with. And to me, that would be more cruel than letting them feel that happiness for a little while.
The reason I've spent so much time on this topic is because it is one that I still wrestle with today. Roughly four years ago, my uncle was diagnosed with a brain tumor, and died a few months later. Every night while he was sick, I prayed for his healing--I begged, I bargained, and I screamed--but in the end, God saw fit to allow him to die. I struggled through my faith for a while after that. But at the end of it all I had to admit three things: (1) The only reason I hurt now is because I was that happy when he was alive, (2) God did not give him the cancer that killed him; he got the cancer because we live in a world where sin has brought death and disease to us, and no one, not even a good man, is immune to them, and (3) As much as I try, I can never know what eternal implications his death had on the world. For all I know, his death might be the one thing that saves thousands one day. I don't know, and I may never know, and because of that, I can't really speak to how fair or unfair his death was.
None of those answers made the pain of losing him any less. And to this day, there are moments where God and I have our discussions about it. But those answers did give me some perspective and help me accept his death. That, and the fact that no matter how bad the pain gets, God carries me all the way. I would have left everything--my future in the church, my ministry, even my faith--for the pain of my uncle's death. But God, in His grace, gave me the strength to endure. And now, looking back, though I don't understand all of it, I can see that God is with me because of His love, and that He will get me through even this.
As I said before, this is not meant to be the answer to all answers on why bad things happen. It's just an answer that seems to make sense to me. And I pray that somehow, it will bring some understanding and peace to you.
Feel free to comment or ask questions. I'm always here.
Keep Soaring,
B
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