I had a conversation with someone the other day, who will remain nameless in case any of my readers know them. It ventured to several different topics, but this particular part grated on me:
"So where does your wife work?"
"She's staying at home right now."
"Well, where does she plan to work?"
"She's doing the stay-at-home wife thing."
"Well, yeah for now, but...I mean...what does she do all day?"
Let me explain to you what my wife does all day:
I get up at 6 AM and feed the dogs their morning meal. Mandy is asleep next to me. I get in the shower. By the time I get out of the shower, Mandy's gone. I put on some pants and a shirt and walk into the kitchen for breakfast, where Mandy is packing my lunch for the day. She usually puts in a sandwich, bag of chips, a coke, and some sort of cookie or candy bar or something. (That's about three things more than what would be in there if I packed it.) I leave for work, teach until lunch time, and then eat that lunch, where I find a note that she somehow slipped into my lunch box without me knowing. I call her to thank her for the note, and if I happen to catch her at home, and not driving to Greenville to cash our church check or going to Walmart because we ran out of milk again, she's normally in the middle of ironing clothes or washing dishes (for those of you who know her, its true. She washes dishes now.) By the time I get home, the floors are all vacuumed, the bed is made, most of the dishes are clean, and even if the house isn't completely cleaned, its leagues closer than it was when I woke up this morning. Supper is usually around 5 or 6, and it is usually something Mandy has made from one of her cookbooks or recipes. And even if it isn't, its from one of those dinner in a box meals that you still have to mix together and cook yourself. We sit down and eat, and almost the second the last morsel of food leaves my plate, she picks it up and carries it to the sink, where she'll wash it later. Then, we both sit down and watch whatever TV show comes on for that day that we like, and spend the rest of the evening engrossed in whatever project we have for the week.
So yeah, my wife is a stay at home wife, and she does quite a bit all day. And the cool thing is, when we start to have children, they're going to have a Mom whose home when they get home from school, one who can come get them if they get sick, and who will never have to miss a ballgame, school play, or music recital because they have too much to do at the office or got scheduled to work the wrong shift.
Now don't get me wrong--I don't think there is anything wrong with a woman who wants to pursue a career and excel at it. My mom was a school teacher for most of my life, and she was good at it. She got her Masters Degree in Education, and is now a very successful ECE teacher at her school. The only time she ever took a day off was when someone in the family was sick. But you know what? She hardly ever missed a ballgame or a band performance or fencing tournament or a Boy Scout family night or church drama performance. At the end of the day, when the dust settled, she was a wife and a mother, and that is what mattered most to her. And I was blessed for it.
So I suppose there are two points to this post: (1) Don't assume that stay-at-home wives and mothers are just being lazy--the world would be a better place if more women put their families over their careers--and (2) if you are a working woman with a husband and children, remember that the most important job you have is being Wife and Mom. What good is a high profile portfolio if it cost you sharing your life with your family?
And men, all this goes just as much for us as it does for the ladies.
Now, if you'll excuse me, Supper is ready. It was cooked by my loving wife, who actually does quite a lot all day.
Feel free to comment or ask questions. I'm always here.
Keep Soaring,
B
