I've been away from the blogging realm for a little while now. I've been in Fort Worth, TX, securing a rent home so that my wife and I won't be literally homeless while I attend Seminary. The LORD had his hand in the whole process. Our new landlords just happen to walk into the hardware store where a friend of mine worked, who happened to mention to said landlords that he has friends (that's us) who just happen to be moving to the Fort Worth Area and needed a home. Then it turns out that the only week we have to go looking just happens to be the week that the landlords are finishing remodeling the house. The cards were shuffled, the dominoes fell, we somehow managed to survive all of my mixed metaphors, and God allowed us to put down a safety deposit on a small but beautiful rent home. Thanks to all who have been praying, and please remember to praise God for His provision.
Something happened to me on the way home from out house hunting. It's a little embarassing, honestly, that it's taken this long for me to get it. But God knows how thick-headed I can be sometimes, and that subtlety for me isn't always the best way to do things.
To spare the suspense, I believe, for the first time in a long, long while, I heard God speak.
Now let me clarify, God did not verbally speak to me. The heavens did not open, I did not have a vision of a winged creature wreathed in light and speaking with a tongue shaped like a sword. I don't have some sort of special communication with God that no one else has. This is not the televangelist "God told me to tell you" horse manuer that you get so often these days. What I am talking about is the Holy Spirit leading and guiding me in a way that is undeniable.
I won't go into details of the circumstances due to their personal nature, but suffice it to say I was very bewildered. Things were going on a track that I didn't know how to get off of, and I was going to crash emotionally if things didn't work out soon. I had asked God for guidance on the subject before, but He never really seemed to be answering. Well this time, He answered. As I said before, it wasn't a grand vision of epic proportions. No, God chose to speak to me in probably the most unlikely way you can imagine.....He spoke to me in a whisper. Just a slight "tug" on my heart that pulled me in a direction I didn't normally go. And the results were profound. Months of confusion suddenly and instantly made clear. Wounds that had been open for far too long, for the first time, seemed to finally be healing. And the oddest part of it all was that it wasn't because of a great effort on my part. It was because God chose to whisper.
I know that this is terribly vague, and if the circumstances didn't involve more people than just me, I would be more forthcoming about it. But the point remains the same--when God spoke to me and gave me an answer to questions that had been plaguing me, He spoke in a whisper. So, if you have tried to listen for God and heard nothing, maybe you were like me. You were looking for skywriting and supernatural events, when really all you need to wait for is a whisper.
I wanna close this post with a lesson that the prophet Elijah learned. He had just seen God work an amazing miracle by conquering the false god Baal. Then, when his life was threatened, he fell into horrible depression. When God came to him, to encourage him, this is what happened:
"A very powerful wind went before the Lord, digging into the mountain and causing landslides, but the Lord was not in the wind. After the windstorm there was an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake. After the earthquake, there was a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire. After the fire, there was a soft whisper. When Elijah heard it, he covered his face with his robe and went out and stood at the entrance to the cave." --1 Kings 19:11-13
To hear God's voice, we don't need to look for miraculous signs and wonders. We need only to listen for a whisper.
Feel free to comment or ask questions. I'm always here.
Keep Soaring,
B
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
The Answer Finale.....
For the past couple of weeks, I've been trying to get something resembling a reason as to why bad things happen to good people. So far, I've mentioned that (1) God has a perspective that we don't have, so when He allows bad things to happen, we need to trust that He does so for our benefit, and (2) The reason bad things like death and disease happen at all is the sin of our hearts, so technically, the blame for tragedy in this world falls on us.
The last thing I want to mention is something I learned from watching Shadowlands, a movie about the love story of C.S. Lewis and his wife Joy. At the end of the movie, after Joy has died of cancer, Lewis says something that I think rings very true. "The pain now is part of the happiness then."
Basically, he's saying that the reason he felt pain when Joy died was because she made him happy, and to be free of the pain of losing her would mean to never experience the happiness that she gave him. We could say the same about the world in general. The reason that we experience pain when tragedies and disasters strike is because we can point to a time where things were good. Lewis felt pain at Joy's death because he experienced happiness in her life. A divorced husband feels pain because he experienced happiness in marriage. Parents of a sick child feel pain because they know the happiness of seeing the child happy and healthy.
There's an old saying that goes like this: "Better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all." We can debate on whether or not that statement is true; for some people avoiding the pain of loss is worth sacrificing the happiness that comes before. But either way, the point I want to make is that if God were truly mean, if He were "a mean kid with a magnifying glass," He would never have let us feel the happiness before. Lewis would never have met Joy, the divorced husband would never have been married, and the parents would never have had children to begin with. And to me, that would be more cruel than letting them feel that happiness for a little while.
The reason I've spent so much time on this topic is because it is one that I still wrestle with today. Roughly four years ago, my uncle was diagnosed with a brain tumor, and died a few months later. Every night while he was sick, I prayed for his healing--I begged, I bargained, and I screamed--but in the end, God saw fit to allow him to die. I struggled through my faith for a while after that. But at the end of it all I had to admit three things: (1) The only reason I hurt now is because I was that happy when he was alive, (2) God did not give him the cancer that killed him; he got the cancer because we live in a world where sin has brought death and disease to us, and no one, not even a good man, is immune to them, and (3) As much as I try, I can never know what eternal implications his death had on the world. For all I know, his death might be the one thing that saves thousands one day. I don't know, and I may never know, and because of that, I can't really speak to how fair or unfair his death was.
None of those answers made the pain of losing him any less. And to this day, there are moments where God and I have our discussions about it. But those answers did give me some perspective and help me accept his death. That, and the fact that no matter how bad the pain gets, God carries me all the way. I would have left everything--my future in the church, my ministry, even my faith--for the pain of my uncle's death. But God, in His grace, gave me the strength to endure. And now, looking back, though I don't understand all of it, I can see that God is with me because of His love, and that He will get me through even this.
As I said before, this is not meant to be the answer to all answers on why bad things happen. It's just an answer that seems to make sense to me. And I pray that somehow, it will bring some understanding and peace to you.
Feel free to comment or ask questions. I'm always here.
Keep Soaring,
B
The last thing I want to mention is something I learned from watching Shadowlands, a movie about the love story of C.S. Lewis and his wife Joy. At the end of the movie, after Joy has died of cancer, Lewis says something that I think rings very true. "The pain now is part of the happiness then."
Basically, he's saying that the reason he felt pain when Joy died was because she made him happy, and to be free of the pain of losing her would mean to never experience the happiness that she gave him. We could say the same about the world in general. The reason that we experience pain when tragedies and disasters strike is because we can point to a time where things were good. Lewis felt pain at Joy's death because he experienced happiness in her life. A divorced husband feels pain because he experienced happiness in marriage. Parents of a sick child feel pain because they know the happiness of seeing the child happy and healthy.
There's an old saying that goes like this: "Better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all." We can debate on whether or not that statement is true; for some people avoiding the pain of loss is worth sacrificing the happiness that comes before. But either way, the point I want to make is that if God were truly mean, if He were "a mean kid with a magnifying glass," He would never have let us feel the happiness before. Lewis would never have met Joy, the divorced husband would never have been married, and the parents would never have had children to begin with. And to me, that would be more cruel than letting them feel that happiness for a little while.
The reason I've spent so much time on this topic is because it is one that I still wrestle with today. Roughly four years ago, my uncle was diagnosed with a brain tumor, and died a few months later. Every night while he was sick, I prayed for his healing--I begged, I bargained, and I screamed--but in the end, God saw fit to allow him to die. I struggled through my faith for a while after that. But at the end of it all I had to admit three things: (1) The only reason I hurt now is because I was that happy when he was alive, (2) God did not give him the cancer that killed him; he got the cancer because we live in a world where sin has brought death and disease to us, and no one, not even a good man, is immune to them, and (3) As much as I try, I can never know what eternal implications his death had on the world. For all I know, his death might be the one thing that saves thousands one day. I don't know, and I may never know, and because of that, I can't really speak to how fair or unfair his death was.
None of those answers made the pain of losing him any less. And to this day, there are moments where God and I have our discussions about it. But those answers did give me some perspective and help me accept his death. That, and the fact that no matter how bad the pain gets, God carries me all the way. I would have left everything--my future in the church, my ministry, even my faith--for the pain of my uncle's death. But God, in His grace, gave me the strength to endure. And now, looking back, though I don't understand all of it, I can see that God is with me because of His love, and that He will get me through even this.
As I said before, this is not meant to be the answer to all answers on why bad things happen. It's just an answer that seems to make sense to me. And I pray that somehow, it will bring some understanding and peace to you.
Feel free to comment or ask questions. I'm always here.
Keep Soaring,
B
Monday, April 6, 2009
The Answer Part 2.....
Last week, I tried to wrestle with the question of why bad things happen to good people. I said part of the answer is that we don't have the perspective that God has. He can see things that we can't, and what hurts today might be the one thing that helps us survive tomorrow. Thanks to those who commented; you gave me a broader perspective on the topic.
The second reason I came across of why good people so often meet tragedy is the fact that this is world is messed up. None of what we're experiencing right now is what we were designed for. Sickness, disease, death, natural disaster, war---none of these were in the schematics when God designed us and the world we would live in. In His foreknowledge, He knew that we would sin and leave Him, and in His grace, He decided to create us anyway. But we weren't meant to be where we are now, living an average of 75 years on this earth, forced to watch people suffer and die.
The worst part of it all is that it's our fault. God is not the one who causes death to happen; death happens because we sin and bring death on the world. Sickness and disease exist because God's standard has been fallen short of. This world is at unrest, flinging its hurricanes and tornadoes and earthquakes and tsunamis about because what it was designed for is not happening.
That's a bitter pill to swallow, especially things that occur out of our control. But it's the truth. We grow old, get sick, and die, because of the sin in our hearts. My first inclination is to shake my fist at God and demand, "Why?" But the sad truth is, if He took the time to give me an answer, He would say something similar to what Paul said to the church in Rome. "And just as they did not see fit to acknowledge God, God gave them over to a depraved mind, to do what should not be done. They are filled with every kind of unrighteousness, wickedness, covetousness, malice. They are rife with envy, murder, strife, deceit, hostility. They are gossips, slanderers, haters of God, insolent, arrogant, boastful, contrivers of all sorts of evil, disobedient to parents, senseless, covenant-breakers, heartless, ruthless. Although they fully know God’s righteous decree that those who practice such things deserve to die, they not only do them but also approve of those who practice them" (Romans 1:28-32).
It isn't God who sends storms to ravage homes, it's sin. It isn't God who creates cancer to kill, it's sin. And it isn't God who brings death that pains us so much; it's sin. He has to punish sin; otherwise He would no longer be God. So if we really must point fingers at someone to blame hardship and heartache on, then we should point to ourselves.
This is why the grace of God is so important. Because despite the fact that sin has all but robbed us of our natural life, Jesus Christ provides us a way to save our spiritual life. We may experience death on Earth, but by grace through faith in Jesus Christ, we can experience life the likes of which we can never imagine.
This reason isn't nearly as encouraging or comforting as last week's or next week's. But it would be wrong to ignore it, because it is true. We die because we sin. But, thanks to God, we can live because of Christ.
Please remember, this is not meant to be the answer to end all answers to such a hard question. This is just what got me through some very difficult times in my life. And hopefully, God can use it to help you.
Feel free to comment or ask questions. I'm always here.
Keep Soaring,
B
The second reason I came across of why good people so often meet tragedy is the fact that this is world is messed up. None of what we're experiencing right now is what we were designed for. Sickness, disease, death, natural disaster, war---none of these were in the schematics when God designed us and the world we would live in. In His foreknowledge, He knew that we would sin and leave Him, and in His grace, He decided to create us anyway. But we weren't meant to be where we are now, living an average of 75 years on this earth, forced to watch people suffer and die.
The worst part of it all is that it's our fault. God is not the one who causes death to happen; death happens because we sin and bring death on the world. Sickness and disease exist because God's standard has been fallen short of. This world is at unrest, flinging its hurricanes and tornadoes and earthquakes and tsunamis about because what it was designed for is not happening.
That's a bitter pill to swallow, especially things that occur out of our control. But it's the truth. We grow old, get sick, and die, because of the sin in our hearts. My first inclination is to shake my fist at God and demand, "Why?" But the sad truth is, if He took the time to give me an answer, He would say something similar to what Paul said to the church in Rome. "And just as they did not see fit to acknowledge God, God gave them over to a depraved mind, to do what should not be done. They are filled with every kind of unrighteousness, wickedness, covetousness, malice. They are rife with envy, murder, strife, deceit, hostility. They are gossips, slanderers, haters of God, insolent, arrogant, boastful, contrivers of all sorts of evil, disobedient to parents, senseless, covenant-breakers, heartless, ruthless. Although they fully know God’s righteous decree that those who practice such things deserve to die, they not only do them but also approve of those who practice them" (Romans 1:28-32).
It isn't God who sends storms to ravage homes, it's sin. It isn't God who creates cancer to kill, it's sin. And it isn't God who brings death that pains us so much; it's sin. He has to punish sin; otherwise He would no longer be God. So if we really must point fingers at someone to blame hardship and heartache on, then we should point to ourselves.
This is why the grace of God is so important. Because despite the fact that sin has all but robbed us of our natural life, Jesus Christ provides us a way to save our spiritual life. We may experience death on Earth, but by grace through faith in Jesus Christ, we can experience life the likes of which we can never imagine.
This reason isn't nearly as encouraging or comforting as last week's or next week's. But it would be wrong to ignore it, because it is true. We die because we sin. But, thanks to God, we can live because of Christ.
Please remember, this is not meant to be the answer to end all answers to such a hard question. This is just what got me through some very difficult times in my life. And hopefully, God can use it to help you.
Feel free to comment or ask questions. I'm always here.
Keep Soaring,
B
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