Enough Complaining....

I've noticed that the past several posts I've made on this blog have been very harsh, very angry, and very pointed.  I've lashed out at the world like a man scorned.  But I can only wallow in my own bitterness for so long before it starts to eat at me.  Its normal to be angry when one sees things that one knows simply should not be.  But to continue to rage against the world and never take the time to change it -- that suggests that one would prefer to be angry than to be satisfied.

This past Sunday I attended a joint Spanish-English service at Journey Baptist Church, where two Hispanic churches from the surrounding area came and worshiped with their Anglo brothers and sisters.  The pastor from the Mount Vernon congregation said two things that struck me: (1) "If I can't use the gifts that God has given me for His glory, I am a miserable person," and (2) "when I became disgusted with the complacency of the people in my church, my pastor said that I was looking at man too much.  I needed to look at God more."

Well, that's where I am right now.  I see churches as a whole trading their desire to seek after the Lord with a desire to stay in the black.  No one wants to be effective anymore--we all just want to be big and well known.  (No, being big and well known does not equal effective, and being well known for how much of a butt hole you are about your beliefs is not being effective either).  And I've made clear my frustrations about that being the trend.  But after Sunday, I feel like the Lord is telling me that it's time to do something about it.  Rather than sit on my butt and become bitter about how the world is, I need to get up, use my gifts, and be the change that I want to see.  I need to look at man less and look at God more.

One of the things I enjoyed most about my time in vocational ministry was teaching.  And while I am thankful for the opportunity I have now to focus on my own relationship with Christ and to focus on being the husband and father I'm supposed to be, I do miss the chance to present Scripture in a practical way that (hopefully) helps to improve the lives of others.  Maybe the reason I'm harboring such bitterness is because I'm looking at man too much, and I instead need to look at God more.  Maybe I need to exercise my gifts to make the world better instead of waiting for it to get better on its own.

I've got some ideas in the works on exactly how I can do that.  I'm also trying to keep my eyes forward to what God wants me to do once I move to Shreveport.  I don't see much out there that I honestly feel like I could buy into with everything, but I don't want to sit and be stagnant either.  The only solution I see is to go out and create that which I wish existed.  I'm still working on how to do that, but the Lord is showing me what I need to see with each step.

Keep Soaring,

B